2006-04-04
a myth. a legend.
I know what it feels like to be consumed by a person. To feel like your life depends on the well being of that human - as if you were born to live for them, breathe for them, die for them. Sometimes it is the best feeling in the world, but most of the time it isn't.
This is when I fear myself. When I have become so comfortably numb to the things that once made my light switch. When I don't think about the things that make others angry or upset. Sometimes I think I am the bearer of news that people don't want to hear. I'm the one who says the words people are thinking, but the words people fear. But I never thought you would explode.
And now I know you'll never say another word to me. I know you'll try to forget it ever happend... but please don't let that happen. I would prefer it if you said things that you were thinking. The truth is that I kind of miss you. I was pleasently surprised the other night when I could talk to you in the library when I got back. And when you say you're okay, I'll know in your voice and your eyes if you are telling the truth.
I hate how a few little words can do so much damage to a person. I hate that those little words can mean so much. This is the very reason I have no real friends. Somehow, I always manage to fuck things up... usually with words.
oilandwater at 6:17 p.m.