2004-02-15
my resources are limited
and then he said that he was staying away from all the girls, because he doesnt need that right now in his life. i wanted to say "excuse me, but do you think thats why i'm calling?" but who knows what he's thinking, i never asked, i never wanted to know. and then he talked like him and josh have been best friends for so long and he wouldnt even talk to me about it until he had talked to josh first. and thats like when mom and dad need to know before they can tell child. i hate that, because he's just backing up the big brother act. there is no rivalry.
but i dont know if i was expecting much more than that. i just called, finally with no real guts and no real reason. i wanted to say hi. and we lost touch for a minute and than we got back in touch and then... i just felt like calling him wasn't the right thing to do. what if he calls josh now. and what will happen. i guess josh won't be able to prevent me from doing anything. i just wanted to say hi. and i did.
oilandwater at 2:22 a.m.