2005-01-01
for the penalty
I wanted to add an entry in my elite skills page but I think I haven't given enough comments to update... so I gave up. But I also wanted to write in here, so here I am.
This week has been a blur, but I know that I have spent most of it very busy and busy and waking up early and sleeping in New York and sleeping with no alarm clock and being happy.
And then new years was great until mom told me she didnt like my eyes and took my beer because I looked drowsy. I got mad so I went in the bathroom. Someone walked in on me but they realized I wasn't peeing so they came and talked to me. And it was okay except for that I really was drunk and drowsy and it was a good cut off. I just get so pissed at my mother when she does things like that.
And I didn't know what I did... but it must have been something really bad, because she talks to me like I can't hear her and she has her eyebrows up near her hair line and her eyes are almost shooting bullets; fully loaded. Anger anger anger.
Waking up like I did, wasn't the way I wanted to. I wanted to wake up to better breath and more comfort. But it was nasty beer breath and major uncomfort. But other than that, I woke up to him and soft skin. I woke up to smiles, kisses, hums and whispers. What a good new years eve.
Except for being cornered in the bathroom by kelly telling me how my brother feels. Kelly drunk is nothing like kelly sober. Kelly drunk is annoying, petty and very selfish. While she wishes she were out for everyone, she only seems to be satisfying herself. And there she is, not letting me stand up or open the door because she has something to say. That it isn't perfect enough and that can't be good.
Apparently people don't accept people for who they are, but only the fake perfect people that they pretend to be. Is that what my family wants for me? Not happiness or prosperity or a good life... but fake perfectness.
And when I asked my mom, she said maybe the swearing sometimes, but no, it's okay. she is a first impressions kind of person. But it's funny though, I'm over first impressions.
It has been so good, challenging, comforting, worth while and I think I cherish that.
oilandwater at 7:53 p.m.